“You turn men back
to dust, saying,
‘Return to dust, O sons of men.’” Psalm 90:3
I
received a note, years ago, from a couple who claimed they wanted my
help. She was dying of ovarian
cancer. She’d kept a journal throughout
her life but had continued to write during her affliction, thinking about issues
she was facing immediately, issues of life and death. She and her husband wondered whether I might
help her—and them—bring something together in book form. Lots of people appreciated her e-mail
reflections, they said; many urged her to collect them. “They should all be in a book,” people told
them.
The
cancer was terminal. Since the verdict
had been handed down, the two of them—with a little help from a financial
benefactor—had decided to do their own “make-a-wish” adventure and travel to
places they’d always dreamed about. They’d had four kids—two of them were in college, all of them in their
late teens and early twenties. Extensive
travel hadn’t been an option earlier in their lives. They’d chosen to live frugally, in a fashion
they would have called, themselves, “stewardly.”
But
Sharon was dying, and there were things she always wanted badly to see, places
she’d always wanted to go. So for a year
or so they’d lived like nomads, and she’d kept that journal, pages and
pages long.
Would you
help us? they asked. Her reflections
would make a good book, people said.
I get
dozens and dozens of such requests, and it’s always painful to have to tell
people that I can’t—or won’t help. I
could have spent every moment of my writing life helping people with their own great
stories or writing those stories myself. I could have done that and never once seen a publication or made a buck
because, honestly, just about everyone has a story—everyone. No one has time to read everyone's.
But something
about this couple’s story seemed especially compelling, so I told them I’d like
to meet them and have a look. I did, and
I took the job on. That was years ago. Eventually,
the book was published.
From that
first phone call to publication was a long, long time, attributable, in a way,
to the fact that the project is—and has been from the very first scribbling—a
labor of love. I’m no angel and I
don’t want to suggest some blessedly big heart; but to be truthful, I knew I'd never
make a dime on that book; and I didn't. Neither did they.
Sharon
never lived to see the publication. Her cancer took her, so the book includes her final jottings, as well
as the detailed plans she’d made for her own funeral. Her lifetime of earthly
musing is history, has been now for years.
Just
before publication, I got an email that reported Sharon’s husband, Dennis, had
cancer himself too. Not long after, Dennis died too.
Lung cancer. Dennis never smoked in his life.
A good friend
of mine once told me her father, a preacher of the Word, loved to do funerals because
he felt he never held people’s attention so fully and completely as he did when he read
Psalm 90 with a coffin set right there in front of him. That's when people listened to the Bible.
“Dust to dust the mortal dies,” the old song says. Not just Sharon, but then her husband too—and,
lest we forget, you and me.
The book? I have three or four copies in a box in the back room.
What is inescapable about Psalm 90 is inescapable about
life: it ends, for all of us. That’s
everyone’s story: "Return to dust, O sons of men."
And all of us do.
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