"Bear in Mind"

For me, it's always something or other connected with school. In one of the iterations, I'm in graduate school, and a victim of my own misbehavior. I haven't been going to some class because the class drives me nuts (I'm not sure why or which class). But I haven't been attending for quite some time, the semester is nearly over, and I'm not sure how I'm ever getting out of the pickle. I fret.

That's the dream.

There's another. This time, I'm a teacher, and the class I'm teaching is way, way, way out of control. I'm standing in front, trying to get students' attention, but nothing stops the constant jabbering. I'm totally powerless. It's as if I'm not there at all, and I'm freaking out. I have no control over the mad rumpus all around.

Both dreams end, blessedly, when some trigger of consciousness reminds me that in real life I'm an old retired guy, that I've not been in graduate school for forty years and not in front of a classroom for quite some time, all of which means that frozen fear is nothing more than some phantom fear from who-knows-when or where. 

"Thank goodness," I tell myself, turn over, and go back to sleep.

Anyway, that's why this poem from the Writer's Almanac just tickles me. No bears in my woods, but I'm there.

Bear In Mind

by John Martin

A bear is chasing me through a meadow
and I’m running as fast as I can but
he’s gaining on me—it seems
he’s always gaining on me.
I’m running and running but also
thinking I should just
turn around and say,
“Stop it! Stop chasing me. We both
know you aren’t going to catch me.
All you can ever do is chase me. So,
think about it—why bother?”

The bear does stop,
and he sits on his haunches and thinks,
or seems to think. And then
the bear says to me,
“I have to chase you, you know
that. Or you should. And, sure,
we both know I’ll never catch you.
So, why not give us both a break and
just stop thinking about me?”

But, with that said, he gets back on four feet,
sticks his long pink tongue out, licks down
both sides of his snout. Then he sighs, looks
behind himself, then at me and says, “Okay,
ready when you are.”