They’d met at Hubbard’s, a booth in the back, where Mary Jane had reached for Tracy’s hand. They'd done that before, the two of them, crying through mutual sadness. She didn't say the word either—Mary Jane didn't. She sat there and held her hands and said, "Jeff and I. . ."
That's all—just enough of a hint of smile for Tracy to know what didn't need to be said, what couldn't be said.
For the first time Tracy understood the Old Testament story, how a childless woman could have wanted a baby so badly she'd take the birth mother to Solomon's court. She knew because she wanted, like nothing else, that tiny little organism clinging to MaryJane's insides.
She and Will rose for the first song. That's why she wasn't going to take communion. She wasn't deserving. She was as full of sin as she was empty of child.
MaryJane Amundson deliberately directed her husband to the seats just behind Will and Tracy Leonard because of what she'd seen yesterday at Hubbards--no matter what words hadn't come from Tracy's lips. She knew what Tracy was feeling. She knew very well because she would have felt it herself, the two of them so close through years of insufferably negative pregnancy tests. MaryJane wanted to sit near Tracy because she had to speak to her, had to touch her.
Pastor Jake De Meester had no clue about Mary Jane’s totally unforeseen pregnancy or Tracy's God-defying jealousy. He knew his parishoners' lives, he thought. He knew that both women wanted children badly, but he also knew about Madeline's unending gossip, Mark's corporate greed, Vangie's blind arrogance, and Brett's flirtation with adultery. When he planned out the service, he knew the church, like every one he'd ever served, was full of problems. But when he planned the service, he wanted to breath new life into an old form because he wanted them all to know and know deeply that the body and blood of Christ was broken and spilled for all of their sin. So that Sunday morning, he had the members of Bethel Church stand and step back to circle the entire sanctuary, forming a ring, a human chain, to celebrate the sacrament.
It wasn't the first time Bethel Church had celebrated the sacrament that way.
Not everyone liked it, of course; but then any innovation Pastor Jake had attempted at Bethel had encountered some understandable resistance. That particular Sunday morning, he was trying to be sure that everything worked smoothly, that there were no wrinkles in the celebration because he wanted the people of Bethel Church to be more comfortable with change. And the fact is, he didn't see Tracy Leonard walk away from her husband and leave the sanctuary. He Hwas busy with the elements.
MaryJane Amundson, however, couldn't miss Tracy’s leaving, since MaryJane and her husband had taken chairs just behind the Leonards. So when Anna Terwain--old enough to be both of those women's mother--when she saw the two of them leave the church as everyone else moved toward the outside walls of the sanctuary, she knew the entire story in a moment, and that's why she left too, unseen.
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Tomorrow: what finally happened outside--and then again in.
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